home wallpapers fan videos icons quotes & sounds screencaps links contact me		Quotes | Buffy the Vampire Slayer: S4/Ep8 (64) "Pangs" prev episode next episode Vampire: A slayer. Why don't you just go back where you came from? Things were great before you came. Buffy: And they say one person can't make a difference. Anya: Look at him. Have you ever seen anything so masculine? Buffy: You mean Gerhardt or his wife? Willow: I think she means... Buffy: Oh. Very manly. Not at all village people. So much sexier than the outfit from his last job. Willow: Oh, I miss the free hot dogs on sticks. Anya: I'm imagining having sex with him right now. Gerhardt: And that's why it's appropriate that the ground-breaking for the UC Sunnydale Cultural Partnership Center is taking place so soon before Thanksgiving. Because that's what the melting pot is about--Contributions from all cultures, making our culture stronger... Willow: What a load of horse hooey. Buffy: We have a counterpoint? Willow: Yeah. Thanksgiving isn't about blending of two cultures. It's about one culture wiping out another. And then they make animated specials about the part where, with the maize and the big, big belt buckles. They don't show you the next scene, where all the bison die and squanto takes a musket ball in the stomach. Buffy: Ok. Now, for some of that, you were channeling your mother? Willow: Well, yeah, sort of. That's why she doesn't celebrate thanksgiving or Columbus Day. You know, the destruction of the indigenous peoples. I know it sounds a little overwrought, but really, she's...She's right. Buffy: With mom at aunt Darlene's this year, I'm not getting a thanksgiving. Maybe it's just as well. Anya: Well, I think that's a shame. I love a ritual sacrifice. Buffy: It's not really a one of those. Anya: To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice, with pie. Anya: What's she doing? Xander said he was going to dig. I want to see Xander dig. Buffy: That's part's just ceremonial. Anya: Well, it bites. She's not rippling at all. Oh. Look, there he goes. Look at him. Willow: Very...Diggy. Anya: Soon he'll be sweating. I'm imagining having sex with him again. Buffy: Imaginary Xander is quite the machine. Willow: While they were pulling Xander out, I heard a couple of the anthro professors talking about it. Man, were they excited. It's the old sunnydale mission, which everyone thought was lost. Buffy: Huh? Willow: Is there something out there? Buffy: Hmm? Oh. No. I'm sorry. A lost mission. I mean, a hairbrush I can understand. And by the way, I will find that and get that back to you. But how do you lose a mission? Willow: Huge earthquake in 1812. Everyone just assumed the mission was leveled. Instead, they built right over it. It's like what happened in the thirties with that church the master was in. Doesn't it make you wonder what else is there, like, right under our feet? Buffy: Mostly, I've just found sewers full of demons. Willow: Oh, right. Man, it's crazy out there. Buffy: Mm-hmm. Post-midterm frenzy. And the holiday. Everyone's going home. Willow: It looks like a lot of lucky moms are gonna be getting brimming baskets of dirty laundry. Buffy: It's so not fair. I mean, they all get a family holiday just because they can go home to their families. Willow: Hmm, it's a turvy-topsy world. Buffy: You know what? I should have my own Thanksgiving. I can cook the meal, just like my mom does, have all you guys over. It'll be great. Willow: Buffy, earlier you agreed with me about Thanksgiving. It's a sham. It's all about death. Buffy: It is a sham, but it's a sham with yams. It's a yam sham. Willow: You're not gonna jokey-rhyme your way out of this one. Buffy: I know...But I want it. It's like professor Walsh was saying about sense memory. I smell a roasting turkey, and I'm 8 years old. I liked having that to look forward to. Everything's different now. Willow: Well, I suppose there could be slight yams. Buffy: I mean, we could definitely use a little comfort food. I bet giles doesn't have any plans. And Xander always tries to avoid all of his family gatherings. Willow: Ooh. We could not invite Anya. Buffy: I don't know. She and Xander seem pretty tight lately. Look, pilgrims aside, isn't that the whole point of Thanksgiving? Everybody has a place to go? Riley: Hey, with a hostile on the loose, we're lucky to be going home at all. Forrest: It's neutered. The implant works great. He can't hurt a single living thing. Riley: As long as he knows about the initiative, he's a threat. We do this the professor's way. Forrest: Mama's boy. Riley: That's a nasty cough. You might need to spend the weekend in quarantine. Forrest: Oh, no. I'm done coughing. Riley: I just don't want anyone getting sick. Anya: Xander, what are you doing? You're supposed to be digging. I went to watch you digging, and you weren't there doing it. Xander: I'm going now. Just...Kinda tough getting going today. Anya: Your head is moist. Oh! You're sick. Well, you can't go to work. Anya: You're pasty and wet and disgusting. They can dig without you. Xander: Look--I don't really feel that bad. Anya: I inflicted a lot of putrefying diseases on men when I was an avenging demon, and you look like you're getting all of them. Xander: Ok. I'll stay. But you should go. You could catch it. Anya: We'll die together. It's romantic. Let me get your trousers off. Xander: You're a strange girlfriend. Anya: I'm a girlfriend? Xander: Uh...There's a chance I'm delirious. Willow: I'll never get used to this. One day, she's at the friendship ceremony. The next day, she's on the news. The coroner's office said she was missing an ear. So I'm thinking, Maybe we're looking for a witch. There's some great spells that work much better with an ear in the mix. Buffy: That's one fun little hobby you've got there, Will. Willow: Or...Or maybe an ear-harvesting demon that--it's, like, building another demon completely out of ears. Or...Ooh. Thought. We're just assuming someone else cut off the ear. What if it was self-inflicted, like Van Gogh? Buffy: So...She brutally stabs herself, dumped the body, then cut off her own ear? Willow: No. She cut off her ear, then killed herself, then dumped the body-- I'm really off my game, aren't I? Buffy: Yeah. Wait. Something's missing from this case. (reads the label) "Early 1800 Chumash Knife." Buffy: Pretty darn scary. It more like a riot than a Ralph's. I thought I was going to have to use Slayer moves on this one woman who was completely hoarding the pumpkin pie filling. Giles: And at some point, you are going to tell me about the murder? Buffy: Oh, right. The knife was some sort of indian artifact. Chumash, I think. That's all we got. Giles: Oh, chumash indians. They were indigenous to this whole area. Buffy: That's interesting. Giles: Then, of course, the murder weapon might have just been a convenient choice. Buffy: Uh-uh. There was a big ol' scissors lying right there. That knife was picked for a reason. Buffy: Do you even own a turkey pan? Giles: Tell me again why we're not doing this at your house. Buffy: Giles, if you would like to get by in American society, then you are going to have to follow our traditions. You're the patriarch. You have to host the festivities, or it's all meaningless. Giles: And this is in no way an elaborate scheme to stick me with the cleanup? Buffy: How about that ceremonial knife, huh? Pretty juicy piece of clueage, don't you think? Giles: You all right? Buffy: Yeah. Uh...I still need to pick up a few things, so I'll check in. And keep your hands off the food. Giles: Oh, I'll try and restrain myself from eating uncooked potatoes and cranberries. Giles: So, what do you think? Angel: She sounds good. Kind of intense about this thanksgiving thing. Giles: I think perhaps she's a little lonely, but I meant about the murder. Giles: Yeah, well, this danger, your friend has some ominous vision about Buffy. It's all terribly vague. I mean, there are other things happening on this campus. Angel: Well, maybe I'm wrong, but I gotta try something. I can't just keep watching. Giles: I'm glad that you're watching out for her, but I feel I should remind you that she's not helpless and it's not your job to keep her safe. Angel: It's not yours anymore, either. Are you going to walk away? Giles: All right. But I feel we should tell her. I don't like keeping this secret. Angel: No. If she knew I was here, it was distract her. It could get her hurt. I don't want to get in the way. Giles: It's not fair. You know that's what she'd say. You can see her, but she can't see you? Angel: Believe me, I'm not getting the good half of this deal. To be on the outside looking in at what I can't...Well, I'd forgotten how bad it feels. Willow: But you have whipped cream. I saw it in Giles' fridge. Buffy: But that's whipped cream in a canister. Look, it's only right if you whip it yourself. Willow: Hey, and then later, we can churn our own butter and make sweaters out of sheep. Riley: Buffy? Hey, Buffy. Buffy: Riley. Where'd you come from? I didn't see you at all. Riley: Oh, just across the street...And a couple of blocks down. Hey, willow. Willow: Hi. Well, I'm just gonna let you two...Look, they're selling coffee in the coffee shop. Yum. Willow: Oh! Angel--evil! You're all evil again. Angel: I'm not evil. I'm here to help Buffy. Willow: What's going on? Angel: My friend had a vision. Buffy's in danger. Willow: So tell her. Help her. Angel: If she sees me, it'll be worse. Willow: See, I don't get that, all this "leaving for her own good" garbage. Because that's what it is. You can't just give up because there's obstacles. What kind-- Angel: Willow. Willow: Sorry. My stuff. Angel: You know how I feel about her. If there was any way... Willow: Yeah. I know. Angel: It's just...Everything's different now. Willow: Hey, is Cordelia really working for you? 'Cause that's gotta be a special experience. Of all the people you could've hired. Angel: Willow, I'm here to protect Buffy. I don't have a whole lot of time for personal stuff. Willow: Right. Well, how can I help? Angel: Well, if you can just tell me...Who's that guy? Buffy: It'll be just like it was when I was a kid. Only without me building a fort out of my mashed potatoes. Riley: Sounds like fun. Buffy: It will be. Um, you know, if you don't already have plans...You should come. I'm a great cook...In theory. I've eaten a lot. Riley: That sounds so great, but I'm outta here tonight. I caught a last-minute flight back to Iowa. Buffy: Iowa. That's one of the ones in the middle, right? Riley: My folks are there. We always do thanksgiving at my grandparents' house. A little farm outside Huxley. Buffy: Sounds nice. Riley: It is. After dinner, we all go for a walk down by the river with the dogs. There's trees and... And I know what you're thinking. It's like I grew up in a Grant Wood painting. Buffy: Exactly. If I knew who that was. Buffy: Well, have fun at the homestead. Riley: Always do. What's the line? Home's the place that, when you have to go there... Buffy: They have to take you in. Spike: You had that in our bed? Do you know how dangerous that is? Harmony: Let's find out. Spike: You wouldn't do it. Harmony: You did it to me, remember? Spike: All right. All right, I'll go. Just-- Harmony: What? Spike: Can I have someone to eat? Buffy: Father Gabriel? Father Gabriel? Father? Are you out here? God. Hus: You can't stop me. Buffy: You're very wrong about that. Hus: Yaugh! I am vengeance. I am my people's cry. They call for Hus, for the avenging spirit to carve out justice. Buffy: They tell you to start an ear collection? Hus: You slaughtered my people. Now you kill their spirit. This is a great day for you. Giles: It's clear we're dealing with a spirit of some kind. It's very common for Indian spirits to change to animal form. Buffy: It's plenty uncommon for me to freeze up during a fight. I mean, I had the guy, I was ready for the take-down, and I stopped. And Native American. Giles: Sorry? Buffy: We don't say "Indian." Giles: Oh, right. Yes, yes. Um, always behind on the terms. Still trying not to refer to you lot as "bloody colonials." Buffy: And the thing is, I like my evil like I like my men--evil. You know, "straight up, black hat, "Tied to the train tracks, soon my electro-ray will destroy metropolis" bad. Not all mixed up with guilt and the destruction of an indigenous culture. Giles: This spirit warrior--Hus, you called him--Has killed innocent people. Buffy: Ok. You know what? We need to boil those and put them through the ricer. Giles: I don't think I have a ricer. Buffy: You don't have a ricer? What do you mean? How could someone not have a ricer? Giles: Well, do you have one at home? Buffy: I don't know. What's a ricer? Buffy: Peas. They come in little pods. You were going to shell them. Willow: I didn't have time. I was busy reading about the chumash war. Giles: The chumash were peaceful. Willow: Oh, they were peaceful, all right. They were fluffy indigenous kittens, till we came along. Buffy: They're gonna be mushy. Willow: They won't be mushy. Giles: I like mushy peas. Buffy: You're the reason we had to have pilgrims in the first place. Buffy: So what happened to the chumash? Willow: How about imprisonment, forced labor, herded like animals into a mission full of bad European diseases. Buffy: Boy. Cultural Partnership Center really didn't stress any of that stuff. Willow: Not even a diorama. And it gets better. The few chumash who tried to rebel were hanged. And when a group was accused of stealing cattle, they were killed--Men, women, and children. And for proof to bring back to their accusers... Giles: They cut off their ears? Buffy: So hus wasn't kidding about the rightful vengeance routine. Giles: He's recreating all the wrongs done to his people. And it's up to us to stop him. Buffy: Yes, but after dinner, right? Willow: Are you sure we shouldn't be helping him? Giles: No, I think perhaps we won't help the angry spirit with his rape and pillage and murder. Willow: Well, ok, no, but we should be helping him redress his wrongs. Bring the atrocities to light. Giles: If the history books are full of them, I'd say they already are. Willow: Giving his land back. Giles: It's not exactly ours to give. Willow: I don't think you wanna help. I think you just wanna slay the demon, then go--La la la. Giles: Willow, I--I have reason to believe buffy herself may be in particular danger from this menace. Willow: You mean...Angel? I saw him, too. Giles: That's not terribly stealthy of him. Willow: I think he's lost his edge. Giles: But Buffy doesn't know. Willow: Oh, no, not a peep. Giles: Well, that's good, but this is why I think we should all keep a level head in this. Willow: And I happen to think mine is the level head, and yours is the one things would roll off of. Xander: Happy Thanksgiving. Giles: Xander. You look like death. Willow: Are you ok? Buffy: You didn't bring rolls? Xander: The doctor couldn't figure out was up with me. He said I had a lot of symptoms that didn't connect. Buffy: I think they do connect. Xander: What, to this chumash spirit vengeance guy? Buffy: Didn't you say the chumash got all diseased when they were all holed up in the mission? Willow: Yeah. This has a better account of everything. It lists the various-- Xander: Various? Willow: Well, the important thing is not to panic. Xander: You just recited the mystical panic-causing incantation, so little hope there. Let's talk about the various. Willow: Well, they did suffer from malaria, some smallpox-- Anya: I was gonna say smallpox. Willow: You know, syphilis, but basically-- Xander: Syphilis? Willow: Well, but this is probably mystical, and it'll all go away as soon as-- Xander: As soon as what? Willow: We still don't know what we're gonna do. Well, maybe I can find something. Let's give him some land. Giles: I'm sure that'll clear everything right up. Willow: Sarcasm accomplishes nothing, Giles. Giles: It's sort of an end in itself. Xander: Can we come rocketing back to the part about me and my new syphilis? Anya: It'll make you blind and insane, but it won't kill you. The smallpox will. Willow: Maybe there's a wiccan spell that can cure it. Something regular medicine doesn't know. Ooh, there was a potion. Sage, salt...Onion? Buffy: That's the stuffing. Xander: Oh, God. Anya: Uh, you're gonna get vesicles and pustules. They have pictures. Xander: I hate this guy. Willow: He's just doing what was done to him. Xander: I didn't give him syphilis. Giles: No, but you freed his spirit, and after a century of unrest, he saw you as one of his oppressors. Xander: What, so he rises up and infects the first guy he sees? That's no fair. Willow: Like you've never woken up cranky? Xander: So we take this guy out. Buffy, it is for to be slaying sometime soon, yeah? Buffy: That's sort of the question before the court. Xander: Question? Willow: There are two sides to it. Xander: Slaying him? The representative from syphilis votes "yay". Xander: He's a vengeance demon. You don't talk to vengeance demons. You kill them. Anya: I didn't know you felt that way. Xander: What? Willow: Anyway, he's a spirit, not a demon. Giles: Yes, and we've never faced this sort of spirit before. We really don't know what will kill it. Willow: Again with the killing. Giles: Figuratively speaking. Or bind it or whatever. Yes, willow, we all appreciate your perspective. Anya: Sometimes vengeance is justified. Xander: You know that I didn't mean you. Willow: I don't think anyone appreciates the truth of the situation. Giles: Oh, I think we do. Buffy: This is no good! It needs more condensed milk. Giles: Buffy, xander's in real danger. Are you sure the solution is pie? Buffy: Over bickering and confusion, I'll take pie. We will find a solution. And we will have a nice dinner, ok? Both. End of story. I'm having thanksgiving, and it'll be perfect. Giles: Hus won't stop. Vengeance is never sated, buffy. Hatred is a cycle. All he will do is kill. Spike: Help me. Ohh! What part of help me do you not understand? Buffy: The part where I help you. Spike: Come on, I'm parboiling out here. Buffy: Want me to help make it quicker? Spike: Invite me in. Giles: No. It's fairly unlikely. Spike: Oh, damn it! look, I'm safe. I can't bite anyone. Willow, tell' em what I did. Willow: You said you were gonna kill me, then buffy. Spike: Yes, bad, but let's skip that part and get to the part where I couldn't bite you. Willow: It's true. He had trouble performing. Spike: Yeah, well, it looks like they've done me for good. Um... Buffy: What are you saying? Spike: I'm saying that spike had a little trip to the vet and now he doesn't chase the other puppies anymore. I can't bite anything. I can't even hit people. Buffy: So you haven't murdered anybody lately? Let's be best pals. Spike: I've got information. About the soldier boys you were fighting. Got the inside scoop. Come on, what have you got to be afraid of? Hus: First people who dwell in mishupashup, hear me and descend. Walk with me upon Itiashup again. Hear me also, nunashush. Spirits from below...Creatures of the night...Take human form and join the battle. Bring me my revenge. Spike: Bloody hell, woman. You're cuttin' off my circulation. Buffy: You don't have any circulation. Spike: Well, it pinches. Spike: I came to you in friendship. Well, all right, seething hatred, but I've got useful information, and I feel I'm being mistreated. Buffy: So tell me everything you know. Spike: I'm too hungry to remember everything. Buffy: Will, anything in those books about how to stop a Native American spirit guy? Some nice, non-judgmental way to, you know, kill him? Willow: I'm not gonna help you kill him. I'm not on board. Buffy, this isn't a Western. We're not at fort...Giles with the cavalry coming to save us. It's one lonely guy. Oppressed warrior guy who's just trying to... Buffy: Kill a lot of people? Willow: I didn't say he was right. Buffy: Will, you know how bad I feel about this. It's eating me up--1/4 cup of brandy and let it simmer--But even though it's hard, we have to end this. Yes, he's been wronged, And I personally would be ready to apologize-- Spike: Oh, someone put a stake in me. Xander: You got a lot of volunteers in here. Spike: I just can't take all this mamby-pamby boo-hooing about the bloody indians. Buffy: Uh, the preferred term-- Spike: You won. All right? You came in and you killed them and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. It's what caesar did, and he's not going around saying, "I came, I conquered, I felt really bad about it." The history of the world isn't people making friends. You had better weapons, and you massacred them. End of story. Buffy: Well, I think the Spaniards actually did a lot of--Not that I don't like Spaniards. Spike: Listen to you. How you gonna fight anyone with that attitude? Willow: We don't wanna fight anyone. Buffy: I just wanna have Thanksgiving. Spike: Heh heh. Yeah...Good luck. Willow: If we could talk to him-- Spike: You exterminated his race. What could you possibly say that would make him feel better? It's kill or be killed here. Take your bloody pick. Xander: Maybe it's the syphilis talking, but... Some of that made sense. Giles: I made these points earlier, but fine, no one listens to me. Buffy: Sure you're up to it? Spike: Oh, leave that one. He looks like he's ready to drop any minute, and I think I can eat someone if he's already dead. Xander: I'm up to it. Spike: You know what happens to vampires who don't get to feed? Buffy: I always wondered that. Giles, plates. Spike: Living skeletons, mate. Like famine pictures from those dusty countries, only not half as funny. Buffy: You can have gravy. That has blood in it, right? Spike: Do you know what else has blood in it? Blood. Buffy: Do I have to gag you? Because I am not gonna listen to you whine all the way through my dinner. It's gonna be a nice, quiet, civilized--You. Listen, maybe I wasn't clear before abouthow terrible we all feel. 'Cause we're trying to help. Spike: What's going on?! Giles: It isn't working. Buffy: Uh, you can have casinos now. Spike: What about me? You gonna leave me here like this? Hey! Watch the heart! Anya: Well, that was a waste of time. Xander: I think he thought we were crazy. Willow: Maybe if anya hadn't opened the conversation with, "Everybody got both ears?" Anya: I liked his wife. She gave me pie. Angel: Willow. Xander: Angel? Anya: So this is Angel. He's large and glowery, isn't he? Anya: He's evil again. Angel: I'm not evil again. Why does everyone think that? Willow: Angel's here to protect buffy. Angel: I haven't been evil for a long time. Willow: She's not supposed to know he's here. Angel, do you have something new? Angel: Yeah. All the chumash weapons are missing from the cultural center. Something's up. Where's Buffy? Willow: Still at giles'. She sent us to check on Dean Guerrero. Angel: Why the Dean? Willow: We think he's going after someone in charge. A leader? Angel: He's a warrior. To a warrior, the leader means the strongest fighter. Willow: Buffy. Willow: We gotta get over there. Angel: I'll call her. You get back fast. Giles: H-hello? Yes....Yes, w-w-we're well aware of that...We-we're under siege now, actually...Thank you. Buffy: Who was that? Giles: A...Someone. Uh, we need a plan. Spike: Remember that conquering nation thing? Forget it. Apologize. Buffy: Shut up, Spike. Spike: Fine, I'll do it myself. Hey, sorry. Sorry about that, Chief. Buffy: Giles, these guys--they don't die. Giles: Bit busy over here. Willow: Why...Don't...You...Die?! Buffy: Your knife can kill you...A bear! Spike: You made a bear! Buffy: I didn't mean to. Spike: Undo it! Undo it! Xander: Hey, Gentle Ben, over here. That's for giving me syphilis. Willow: I feel lousy. Giles: Turkey came out rather splendidly. Buffy: Oh, it was yummy. Willow: It's just...Did you see me? 2 Seconds of conflict with an indigenous person, and I turned into General Custer. Giles: Violence does that. Instinct takes over. Spike: Yeah, that's the fun. Buffy: Nobody asked you. Spike: Oh, lay off. You all had a fine meal. Buffy: Wasn't exactly a perfect Thanksgiving. Willow: I don't know. Seemed kinda right to me. A bunch of anticipation, a big fight, and now we're all sleepy. And we did all survive. Buffy: I guess that much is true. First Thanksgiving on my own, and we all got through it. Xander: And you know what? I think my syphilis is clearing right up. Buffy: And they say romance is dead. Or maybe they just wish it. Willow: Well, maybe we started a new tradition this year. Maybe not. But at least we all worked together. It was like old times. Xander: Yeah, especially with Angel being here and everything. prev episode next episode